Callum的社群平台（全英文）Callum’s social media platforms：
twitter@AutisticCallum_
instagram@autistic_callum_
在英語為主的平台上關注了些許個人倡議者，其中最喜歡、最能共鳴的就是Callum。
他總是以溫和的方式表達想法，對於各種聲音抱持著尊重，偶爾也會以影片的方式分享，內容幽默活潑。尤其他似乎也喜歡復古的事物，版面上時常出現復古電影劇照，並加上令光譜者能夠感同身受的句子（比如成功讓沒有電話恐懼的朋友替自己打電話、因為一個標示著早上八點到晚上八點之間會抵達的包裹而整天無法專注……等），十分特別。
在英語為主的平台待著，有時回到中文和法文的環境，尤其是中文平台（台灣為主），有些感嘆泛自閉光譜族群的個人（當事）倡議者並沒有那些英語平台的使用者那麼活躍。儘管線上或者現實中的倡議者都有一些活躍中，但總覺得是各自散落在不同平台（臉書、IG、部落格、個人網站等），不若國外的光譜倡議者們那樣同時聚集在平台上（他們主要使用IG和推特，類似的帳號非常多，且彼此會交流，讓泛自閉光譜相關的資訊能夠傳播得更遠）。
台灣也有很棒的成人亞斯討論的私人社團；但這種比較向外、倡議形式的帳號卻相對較少，相關的討論亦然。我的力量也很小，因此總讓我覺得有些可惜。
近期重新開啟了【哈囉，友人在嗎？】的筆談系列，於是鼓起勇氣邀請了一些欣賞的人士，尤其希望能多邀請國外那些已經進行個人倡議多年的光譜者，Callum就是其中之一。他十分友善且爽快地答應了，令我非常感動。
很謝謝Callum願意接受筆談。現在，請讓我們開始吧！
I’m following several autism self-advocacy accounts on English-speaking platforms such as Twitter and Instagram, and one of the accounts that I can relate to the most, is Callum’s.
His way of expressing his thoughts are always very soft and very caring, and he is always respectful toward those who have different opinions. Sometimes, he also shares videos and I’m always so happy to see his videos because of his heart-warming, humorous way of sharing. Also, he uses vintage film stills with captions that autistic people can easily relate to, which is such an interesting way of sharing that makes me smile each time I see one.
I’ve been in the English-speaking autism community for a while now, and I often find it quite a shame that autism self-advocacy accounts aren’t as popular and as many as in English-speaking platforms… I know there are several self-advocates here and there, but they aren’t gathered, and their voices can’t seem to get far enough.
Even though there is a very good private network for autistic adults to exchange and to communicate in Taiwan, it’s still a private, closed group (on Facebook), unlike a self-advocacy account which is an open space for autistics and allistics to learn and to connect. It’s a pity that the aim of the Facebook group isn’t to spread autism awareness to other autistic people, or eventually neurotypicals.
Since I’ve decided to re-start my written interview project, I wanted to invite more neurodivergent people to share their experiences with me. I’ve gathered enough courage to contact Callum, and I’m so, so happy that he accepted!
Thank you so much, now please let us begin.
小太陽Miya（以下簡稱陽/M）：
首先再次謝謝Callum願意接受筆談！
想請問你是在什麼契機、在什麼時候決定要在網路上分享你的人生經歷，成為一位個人倡議者？
從你的許多分享可以感受得出，你是一個非常用心、細膩的光譜者，你也有在置頂推文提過你對於身為泛自閉光譜者很驕傲的其一原因，是因為自己擁有極高的同理、共情能力；然而，我也很想知道，作為高敏感的泛自閉光譜者，同時擁有倡議者身份，並且有著許多追隨者，這樣的特質對於你的倡議帶來了什麼樣的影響？
除了更能夠理解與你互動的人們，是否也曾導致過度地吸收、混淆他人的情緒，或者難以從他人負面評論與誤解復原的情形？
也想問問你有沒有什麼建議，能夠給予對於分享自身經驗有興趣，或者剛起步的，一些比較敏感的個人倡議者？
I’d like to thank you again for having accepted this written interview!
First question! When and why did you decide to share your experiences on the internet?
By reading things you shared, I think you are a very kind, attentive and caring person. You also mentioned in your pinned tweet that one of the reasons why you’re proud of being autistic, is because of your high level of empathy.
I wonder if being highly empathetic has helped you in your self-advocacy journey, or has it caused some difficulties? For instance, has it ever made you absorb too much of other people’s emotions? Was recovering from criticism or misunderstandings (attacks) from other users more difficult for you due to being highly empathetic (or highly sensitive)?
I also want to ask you if there are some things you want to share with highly sensitive autistic individuals who’d like to share their own experiences/who’d like to start self-advocacy accounts on social media?
Callum：
首先非常謝謝Miya邀訪我，也謝謝你的稱讚！
或許聽起來有點古怪，但我會開始在網路上開設個人倡議帳號，是因為二零二零年七月的某天晚上十一點半，我的心裡有個溫暖堅定的聲音，告訴我我應該創建一個Instagram帳號，並且分享有關議題的內容去幫助其他泛自閉光譜者。那聽起來像是個神聖的傳話，而我認真地看待它。在此之前，我已經有私下紀錄一些個人經驗，所以把它們公開來並不會讓我感到太羞怯。唯一的差別只在於我會讓它們被眾人看到，而我對此很是期待。
我覺得，做為一個高敏感、高同情力（共感能力強）的人，讓我能夠和來自世界各地的人們（讀者）產生深刻的連結，而我非常感激。不過你說的也沒有錯，高度同情心同時讓我更容易吸收屬於別人的情緒，而當我們試圖與一群不斷被社會排斥、擁有創傷的人們連結，我也時常吸收別人的創傷情緒。曾有一陣子，我對於吸收他人的情緒與創傷並未多想，直到這開始影響了我自己的身心健康。我學會了替自己設立人際界線，好比只有在我確定自己能夠承受的狀態下才去查看社群網站的私訊（因為裡面可能會有一些讓人心碎的內容），並且不在睡前兩小時查看訊息。
我會建議每個想要在網路上開始個人倡議活動的人，先在相關的平台、社群裡待一陣子，觀察各個留言區域其他光譜者們的分享。這會讓你能夠了解多數光譜者有哪些共同的體驗，並且讓你發展出具體且富有知識（資訊）、能夠助人的內容。而當你開始實際運作自己的倡議帳號時，我建議像上述那樣設立人際界線，保護自己的心理健康。你必須要先安頓好自己，才能幫助別人。
Firstly, thank you very much for inviting me to this interview, Miya, and thank you also for your kind words!
As peculiar as it may sound, I decided to start writing about autism online because at around 11.30pm one evening in July 2020, when I was trying to get to sleep, a strong but sweet voice entered my mind and told me that I must create an autism Instagram account and create content to help other autistic people. It sounded like a divine message and I took it seriously. Up to this point, I had been privately writing about my experiences as an autistic person, so the idea of writing content for an online platform didn’t sound too intimidating. The only difference was that for once my writing would be shared with others, which I was very excited about.
I think that being empathetic has helped me to form deep connections with other autistic people across the globe and I am most grateful for that. You are right, though - being empathetic can make it easier to absorb other people’s emotions, and when you are connecting with members of a community that has been marginalized and subject to great trauma, this can make it easier for me to absorb other people’s trauma. For a while, I took on this trauma without giving it a second thought, but as time progressed it started to affect my mental health. What helped me through the other side was setting boundaries, like only checking and responding to my DMs when I have the emotional capacity to deal with anything heartbreaking that I might read, and never checking DMs during the two-hour run-up to bed.
I would recommend that anyone thinking of starting an autism advocacy account take time to immerse themselves in the autistic community by following other accounts and engaging in their comments sections. This will allow them to see common experiences that affect the community and empower them to create from a place of knowledge, compassion and awareness, and proceed with tact. Then, when they are active, I recommend setting healthy boundaries, like the DM ones I enforce. You cannot help others unless you help yourself too.
陽/M：
作為一個很晚才確診為疑似個案的光譜者（二十歲出書以後得知），當我重新審視自己的童年，我才發現有許多曾經也覺得自己奇怪、無法讓人理解的狀況，其實都可能是特質造成的。因此我很感謝我的童年醫生發覺了我的特質，讓我總算明白自己的「怪」不是因為我是個不好的人，而是因為我的腦部連接和大家不一樣，而這不見得是個壞事。
在你的IG Q&A裡面，你提到自己是大約在十五、十六歲的時候確診的，這對於光譜者而言應該也算是稍微比較晚的情況。
想請問Callum，覺得自己在確診後，看待自己的方式有什麼改變嗎？會不會希望能夠更早知道自己是光譜者？
我曾看過有些人確診後，被身旁的人認為「比確診前更像是光譜者」（懷疑因確診後想要「符合身份」而刻意讓自己更有此特質），好奇你對於這個情形的看法（偷偷說，我自己是覺得，被這麼說的當事者只是因為更了解自己、知道自己不是「有問題的人」以後，學會了移除自己建立的社交迷彩）。
As someone who was late-diagnosed (at 20 after the publishing of my book), when I look back at my childhood, especially teenage years, I understand that some of my quirks or even some “reasons” that made people dislike me, are actually autistic traits. I’m very grateful to my childhood psychiatrist who, aftering reading my book, told me that I’m autistic, and made me understand that me being weird doesn’t mean I’m a “bad person”, I’m just wired differently.
From your Instagram Q&A, you mentioned that you were diagnosed at around 15/16, it’s probably also considered late for an autism diagnosis.
Has your way of perceiving yourself changed after you received your diagnosis? Do you wish to have known earlier that you’re autistic?
Also, I’ve seen some autists share their experiences of being blamed “more autistic after the diagnosis” by neurotypicals close to them, I wonder what are your thoughts about this situation (I guess it’s because those autists have learnt to unmask since their diagnosis, because they now understand that they don’t need to be fixed and they can finally be themselves)?
Callum：
我的泛自閉光譜診斷在我人生中很困難的時期到來，當時我正在療癒進食障礙的過程中，並且對於我的人生全然不知所措；但當我能夠處理確診的資訊並且了解它的意義、去了解光譜以後，我能夠更和緩地看待自己。我停止認同外界對我的批判——太過獨行、不想去夜店而更喜歡待在家裡，我拋下這些批評並接受這是我的「不一樣」所致。
許多晚確診的光譜倡議者（許多比我還要更晚得到診斷的人們）都表示他們希望自己能更早被確診。我可以理解並且尊重他們的看法，但對我而言我覺得我的診斷「遲」得很適合，在那個時期才確診對我反而是幫助。即使是二零二二年的現在，人們對於泛自閉光譜的了解仍舊不多，而在我成長的九零到二零零零年代，人們知道得更少。我害怕若我在更早期被確診，我可能不會得到適切的協助，或是被汙名化、被剝奪許多機會（比如符合我理解能力的教育場域）。當然，我永遠不會曉得若我早點確診，情況會是如何，但我覺得順其自然就好，我很感激我的診斷到來的時期。
我同意你對於「為何有些人確診後會表現得『更像光譜者』」的想法。當我們的「不一樣」被給出了一個具體的解釋，我們更能夠擁抱自己的不同並且不再隱藏那些不同，這可能會顯現在行為或生活習慣上的改變，而我覺得這是很健康且可理解的。
My autism diagnosis came at a very challenging time in my life, as I was in the midst of an eating disorder and overwhelmed with life, but when I was able to process it, understand what it meant and learn about autism, I was able to view myself and treat myself with more compassion. I stopped judging myself for the things others judged me for - like being solitary, not wanting to go to nightclubs and preferring to stay indoors instead of going outside - and instead saw them as a natural and valid result of my difference.
So many late-diagnosed autistic advocates - many of whom were diagnosed much later in life than I was - express that they wish they had received their diagnosis earlier. I can understand why and I respect their truth, but for me I think it was probably helpful that I was not diagnosed sooner. We are now in 2022 and people still know so little about autism, and when I was growing up in the 90s and early 2000s, people knew even less. I fear that had I been diagnosed sooner I would not have received appropriate support, would have been stigmatized and would have been deprived of various opportunities (like an education that was appropriate for my level of understanding). Of course, I will never know what could have been, but I believe that everything happened just as it should have in my life and I am grateful to have received my diagnosis when I did.
I concur with your explanations of why people might be perceived as “more autistic” after receiving a diagnosis. Having your differences confirmed and also potentially explained and validated can help you to accept them and embrace them, which is bound to translate into various changes in your behavior and your lifestyle, which I think is valid, understandable and healthy.
陽/M：
閱讀與寫作一直是我最喜愛的事情，而我總是覺得，比起開口說話，書寫讓我更能自在地表達。
之前在你的Instagram上面讀到你即將出書的消息，非常替你開心！
不曉得書寫是不是也讓你感到更為自在？
在你分享過的推和貼文中，有沒有幾篇是最代表你的核心思想，或是你最想要和關注你的人們分享的？
Reading and writing have always been my favorite things (special interests), and I’ve always thought that, instead of talking, I feel more comfortable expressing myself through written words.
Also, I saw on your Instagram that you are going to publish your book too. I’m so, so happy for you and I truly look forward to reading it!
I wonder if you feel more comfortable expressing yourself through written words as well?
Among all the posts/tweets you have shared so far, are there some important contents that can represent who you are, values you cherish, or are there posts you’d want to share the most with your followers?
Callum：
謝謝你！我寫得很開心，也對於書本的後續很期待！
隨著年齡漸長，而我越來越自在地表達，我很享受以不同的媒介分享自己的想法，包含Instagram的短片形式。我曾經很害怕鏡頭，所以我很高興我能有這樣的進步！
然而，像你一樣，我也覺得以文字的方式表達是最自在的。我是一個以文字與圖像思考的人，所以能夠把我的想法以文字表述出來、能夠慢慢地將文字拼湊成我的所思所想，讓我感覺很安心。
我創作了許多內容，而我在網路上分享的僅是一小部份，畢竟我是一個完美主義者。我信守著所有我曾分享過的一切，因為我只創作我認為真摯的內容；但如果要我選擇我最喜歡的幾個貼文，那麼應該會是那些有關光譜的正面特質的內容（並不是因為困難與負面情況較不重要，而是我覺得正向的部份比較少被討論到）。因此，那些有關泛自閉光譜的美好特質的分享，對我來說是最重要、最想和大家分享的。然而，我也很喜歡那些有關科學相關數據探討的貼文，因為那是最難寫的類型。
Thank you! I am enjoying writing my book and am very happy about its future!
As I grow older and more comfortable in my skin and in my ability to express myself, I am enjoying expressing myself in many forms of medium, including reels. I used to be terrified of the camera, so I am happy with this progress!
But, just like you, I feel most comfortable expressing myself in a written medium. I am a literal and visual person, so it is comforting being able to put my thoughts into actual words that I can see and take the time to piece them together and alter them until they express exactly what I intend to.
I create a lot of content and publish only the tip of the iceberg of what I create because I am quite the perfectionist. I stand by all that I have shared, because I only create what feels authentic to me, but if I had to choose any favourite posts, it would be those that present the positive aspects of being autistic (not because the challenges are any less important, but because I feel that the positives are disproportionately underrepresented). So, my posts, reels and tweets that reference cool autistic skills, talents and traits to be proud of mean the most to me. But, I also have a sweet spot for the posts and tweets that explore scientific studies or common autistic issues, because those are hard to write!
陽/M：
儘管我算是比較晚被發覺的光譜者，我的媽媽仍舊在我國中時期就想過我可能在光譜上，並且買了相關書籍給她和我閱讀。
我記得其中有一本，是一位亞斯男孩寫的自傳，我讀完以後，覺得有許多部份（尤其社交相關困難的描述）讓我能夠共鳴，那時便已提起了我對泛自閉光譜的好奇與興趣。
很好奇在你的成長過程中，有沒有讀過哪些讓你思考自己可能與別人「不一樣」、讓你認識自己的書籍？
或者，在你確診以後，有沒有哪些光譜者的書籍讓你很能夠共鳴、想推薦給大家的？
Even though I am rather late-diagnosed, my mother still suspected that I might be autistic when I was in middle school. She bought books for herself and for me to read about autism.
I remember there was this book written by an Irish autistic boy (formerly diagnosed as having asperger’s), I could relate to what he has written (especially social interactions related difficulties), and that has raised my curiosity for autism.
I wonder, before your diagnosis, have you read any book which made you think of possible explanations of your “differences”, or any book that made you understand yourself more?
Is there any book from fellow autists which you can relate to, which you want to recommend?
Callum：
在我確診以前，我並沒有讀太多關於泛自閉光譜的書籍，但近幾年我讀了很多很棒的書，而我想與你們分享。我很喜歡Sara Rose Gibbs的《Drama Queen》，Dr. Devon Price的《Unmasking Autism》，以及Biana Toeps的《But You Don’t Look Autistic At All》，我想分享給所有想要閱讀由光譜者書寫的光譜倡議書籍的人們。給家長們的話，我推薦我的朋友Danielle Punter與她的工作夥伴Charlotte Chaney所寫的書《Parenting Rewired》（譯者按：就我所知這些書籍都沒有翻譯成中文，都是英文的版本）。我好希望在我成長過程中，有這樣一本給家長的書籍，能夠幫助我的家人陪伴我和我的姊妹。這樣的書或許可以大大地幫助我的父母和我的姊妹，也可能讓他們意識到我的「不一樣」。
Prior to my diagnosis, I actually didn’t read anything about autism, but in the past couple of years I have read some fantastic books that I would recommend. I love Sara Rose Gibbs ‘Drama Queen’, Dr Devon Price’s ‘Unmasking Autism’ and Biana Toeps’ ‘But You Don’t Look Autistic At All’ and would recommend those to anyone who wants to read books written about autism by autistic writers. For parents, I recommend my friend Danielle Punter’s book, ‘Parenting Rewired’, that she co-wrote with her business partner Charlotte Chaney. I wish there had been a parenting book like that around when my sister and I were growing up. It would have really helped my parents to support my sister and maybe would have helped them to identify my differences too.
陽/M：
在台灣，我所能想到的泛自閉光譜當事倡議者，有透過出版社推出實體書籍的人並不多（撇除家長和學者專家的相關書籍）、跳脫網路世界、持續在現實中倡議的也不多（若不算自費出版與個人電子出版的話），儘管這也有可能是因為我目前在法國，對於台灣的倡議圈子（？）比較不熟悉的緣故，若有說錯或遺漏，還請再告訴我。
我的書當時出版時是主打感覺統合障礙與早產的部份，因此泛自閉光譜相關並不會第一個想到我（我能想到的倡議者也都是男性為主）。
確診後，我特別在關注「偏向女性的泛自閉特質」，我知道有些國家也有專供女性光譜者療癒的醫師與心理師。
有許多人認定（這點我很能感同身受），女性較常被雷達忽略、容易誤診或是晚確診，是因為社會加諸在女性身上更多的要求，很多特質會被忽視、視作理所當然（害羞少話、隱忍等），並且讓女性（以及非二元性別、個性較柔和的生理男性等）容易在成長過程中更加發展社交迷彩，導致後續難以拿掉社交面具。
想請問Callum，你覺得有「偏女性的特質」的狀況嗎？作為一位同性戀泛自閉光譜者，性格相對柔和，你是否也會有那些「偏女性特質」所帶來的不便？你又是如何度過、調節那些不便之處？
In Taiwan, I can rarely think of any autistic advocates (I can only think of 3 aside from myself), but maybe it’s because I currently live in France and I have missed new information and eventually new advocates too (if so, I will update here).
In the mainstream publishing industry in Taiwan (without counting vanity publishing nor online e-books), there are rarely books written by autists (without counting those written by parents and “experts”), there aren’t many advocates on the Internet nor in real life).
Unfortunately, when my book was published, it was more targeted to readers who have SPD (Sensory Processing Disorder, I was diagnosed at 6 with SPD) and readers who were born prematurely, so when people talk about autism spectrum advocates and books related to the topic, they won’t think of me immediately, and other 3 advocates are all males.
After my diagnosis, I read many things about “autism in women” and how it differs from some stereotypical, “male” traits.
Some say the fact that females tend to be misdiagnosed, undiagnosed or late-diagnosed is because of society’s expectations (and I can totally relate to it), some traits are only seen as personalities/normal behaviours of females and therefore reinforce the need for masking for female/non-binary autists in order to survive, leading to difficulties in unmasking later in life.
I wonder if you find yourself more on the side of having “autistic female traits” (I don’t know if we can call it this way)? As a homosexual person and also an autist who seems to have less stereotypical traits, do you have the same issues growing up (difficulties in unmasking, having your traits overlooked by others, etc.)? How do you cope with these difficulties?
Callum：
這真是個有趣的問題！
我知道近期有很多相關的討論，關於指認男女之間的特質差異是否真的能夠幫助幫助光譜上的人們，因為這是一個相對二元對立性質的思考模式（這樣的形式不夠廣泛包容其他非二元性別和其他的性別定義），且將特質給予其相應的性別指向不見得是精準的。我覺得，如果能夠讓大眾更了解所有各式各樣可能的泛自閉光譜特質，並確保這些特質的呈現和理解含括所有性別，那會是最為理想的。
思考了一下我自己的特質，以及通常會被歸類在不同性別的特質（無論它們是否足夠精準），我發覺在我小的時候，我擁有比較「典型」、「男性化」的泛自閉特質（比如喜歡火車、喜歡直線排列小車子），但也有「女性化」的特質（比如社交迷彩、擁有偏大眾化的特殊興趣如音樂與心理學）。這或許是因為我是一個同性戀男子、因為我看待性別的態度較為靈活開放，又或者因為本就不應將泛自閉光譜的特質以二元性別分化。我擁抱我所有與泛自閉光譜相關的特質，因為我不覺得他們有什麼「不好」。
That’s such an interesting question!
I know that there is currently a lot of debate about how helpful it is to recognise traits as male or female, because that’s quite a binary way of looking at things (that isn’t inclusive of all genders), and because it is probably not wholly accurate to exclusively or even closely associate specific traits with specific genders. However, various studies indicate that often differences can occur between the different genders’ experiences. I think, from my perspective, it would be good if we could spread awareness about all autistic traits and ensure that information and representations of autism are gender inclusive and honour the spectrum of autism.
Reflecting on my traits and the traits commonly associated with different genders (however accurate they are), I can see that from childhood I displayed autistic traits associated with boys (such as loving trains and lining up cars) and girls (such as masking and having mainstream special interests, like music and psychology). This could be because I am a gay man, because I have flexible attitude towards gender and/or because it is simply not entirely accurate to categories autistic traits according to gender. I embrace all of my autism-related differences, because I see nothing wrong with them.
陽/M：
許多泛自閉光譜者在學生時期都有過被排擠、校園霸凌的情況。
我的學生時期（幾乎是從幼稚園開始），便經歷著誤解和排斥，以至於我一直以為自己是一個不好的人。
我遇到的多是一些惡意的言語和關係上的孤立。因為沒有肢體上的暴力，我一直以為沒有關係、我不可以太脆弱，而且已經過了很多年，所以應該沒事了（不可以抱怨、不可以再繼續難過）。
然而，當我接觸到複雜性創傷後壓力症候群（C-PTSD）和拒絕敏感焦慮症（RSD）相關的資訊，我才明白，我的那些害怕被討厭、對於批評的過度難受反應（無論是否有建設性）、各種過往的情緒回放，以及過度自責與過度道歉，其實都是那些屢屢受到排斥和不被喜歡所導致的狀況。
想請Callum談談關於C-PTSD與RSD，面對這兩者所造成的困擾，你是否有什麼調適和舒緩的方法？
對於不幸有著疑似C-PTSD或是RSD狀況的光譜者們，能否和他們說一些打氣的話語？謝謝你。
Many autists have gone through isolation, and being bullied at school.
During my teenage years (but it was already the case when I was in kindergarten), I was often misunderstood, neglected and pushed away by peers, which made me believe that I’m a bad, mean person, that’s why everybody disliked me.
It was mainly relational and verbal bullying. Since there wasn’t any physical violence, I thought things were fine, I didn’t want to make it a big deal (I didn’t want to keep complaining), I didn’t want to be too fragile. I told myself that it happened years ago and I should be alright now.
However, when I started to read about C-PTSD and Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, that’s when I understood that, my fears of being disliked, my extreme reactions to when I get rejected or when I get criticisms (whether they’re constructive or only mean words), and all those emotional flashbacks, the over-apologizing and self-blaming acts, are all because of my negative experiences at school (and online).
I wonder if you also have these kinds of experiences to share, and when you encounter these negative situations, do you have any way to overcome them?
Can you please write some words to encourage other autistic people who are going through bullying, RSD or C-PTSD? Thank you so much.
Callum：
我很遺憾得知你曾經被霸凌！我對於泛自閉光譜者有多麼高的機會曾經歷過霸凌，感到非常震驚。我也同樣經歷過校園霸凌。
拒絕敏感焦慮症和複雜性創傷後壓力症候群時常是難以對付的，而我也不是一個醫學相關的專家，但從我個人和我身邊所愛之人的狀況吸取經驗，我覺得有些可能有幫助的事項可以分享。
●我們常常被教導應該要在收到批評時反思自己，並且讓那些批評教育我們些什麼，這可以是很正向很有智慧的行徑，但有時並不是所有的批評都對我們有幫助。如果有人說了什麼讓你感到受傷的話，想想那些話語中有沒有一些你能夠學習的點，如果沒有，就不再去在意它。並非所有批評都是有建設性的。
●我們時常被教導如果我們與多數人的想法不同，那麼我們就是錯誤的那方、並且需要反思自己，但這並不總是正確。很多泛自閉光譜者純粹以不同的角度去檢視事情，或許他們的視角並非主流，這不代表它們就不能被接受。我很鼓勵大家信守自己的想法。
●我們不能討所有人的歡心，所以請試著不要去討好別人。我們不必透過去討好所有人，來證明自己是個「好人」。我們應該時刻保有好的出發點，並且注意我們的言行可能帶來的後果、對於自己的錯誤勇於道歉；但你不必讓所有人都滿意，也無法讓所有人開心。
●不必因為善待自己、把自己放在第一位而感到羞恥，有時這甚至是必須的。如果你不率先在乎自己的需求，還有誰會呢？
●並非所有的拒絕都是針對我們；有時或許是的（而這種時候或許可以停下來想想，那個人對你的看法很重要嗎？），但有時真的不是。所有都有他們各自注重和忙碌的事物、有著各自的困難和各自的旅程，時常他們會陷入幫助自己的過程而無暇顧及其他。我發覺大多時候，當我感覺被一些人的反應所傷，那都是因為一些誤解（他們太過忙碌、被事務淹沒、過度疲憊，或者因為各式困難而痛苦著）。這種狀況下，那些人的反應通常是因為他們自身，而不是他們對於我的攻擊或是他們對我有什麼負面看法。
I’m so sorry to hear that you were bullied! It is shocking to me how common it is for autistic people to be bullied. I experienced bullying at school as well.
RSD and C-PTSD can be so tricky to navigate and I am by no means an expert, but based on my own experiences and those of my loved ones, I think some helpful things to remember are:
We are often taught to reflect on criticism and allow it to teach us something, which can be wise, but at the same time not all criticism is fair and helpful. If anyone says anything that you find hurtful, consider if there is anything objectively and practically useful that you can take from it, and if there isn’t, discard it. Not all criticism is constructive.
We are told that if the majority sees things one way and we see it another that we are wrong and need to self-reflect, but this is not always the case. Many autists simply see things differently, and whilst their perspectives might not be popular, this does not mean they are invalid. I would encourage anyone reading to stand by their convictions.
You cannot please everyone, so please do not try to people-please. You don’t need to please everyone or go out of your way to please anyone to be a good person. You need to have good intentions, be mindful of the impact of your actions and apologize when things go badly (among other things), but you do not need to bend the earth to make others happy.
There is no shame in putting yourself first and sometimes it is necessary. If you don’t have your best interests at heart, who will?
Not all rejection is personal; sometimes it is (and in which case, does that person’s opinion even matter? You’ll never connect with them), but sometimes it isn’t. Everyone has their own priorities, journeys and challenges that they are navigating, and often other people get lost amidst the commotion. I’ve found that 90% of the time when I have been hurt by someone it is because of a misunderstanding that has occurred as a result of them being too busy, too overwhelmed, burnt out or struggling with executive dysfunction. In these situations, their behaviour is generally a reflection of them and their challenges and not an attack on me or a reflection of how they feel about me.
陽/M：
最後，我想恭喜Callum，最近你剛得到了你的ADHD診斷，很替你高興，多認識了自己一些！
據說ADHD腦內的連接方式，和泛自閉光譜又有不同，因此ADHD加上光譜，是不同再更加不同，但也因此美好。
真的很謝謝你抽空完成了筆談，我真的好開心能訪問到你！
Lastly, congrats for your ADHD diagnosis, I’m so happy for you that you get to know yourself even better!
I read some articles and tweets saying that ADHD brains are wired differently than autistic brains, so being AuDHD is another different type of neurodivergent brain, but it’s also its beauty.
Thank you so, so much for accepting this written interview, I’m so happy to be able to talk (write?) with you!
Callum：
Thank you very much, Miya! It has been a pleasure!
非常謝謝你！我很高興能夠完成這個筆談！